Feeling Better (A.K.A. Becoming the Master of Distraction)

April 13, 2013

I have never been that great at doing this whole “sick day” thing. Today, however, I sucked it up and made myself stay put on the futon with enough Sprite to probably fill a swimming pool and my laptop. Upon spending many hours baffled as to why I do not spend more time “surfing the interwebs”, I discovered several gems. One of these precious jewels comes from a website called the Thought Catalog. I saw that there is an “About” link on the site, but honestly I was not interested in clicking it. There were no foreseeable pictures and I was not reading anything word for word (thank you cold medicine). With that being said, I have no idea why this website exists or who the contributors are, but I found some pretty frank and fantastic reads. One was particularly fitting for my current situation of being all germy and such- 25 Ways to Feel Better When You Feel Sad by Steven Scott (Link can be found at the end of my post). Naturally, sick/fluish persons get sad and slightly stir crazy. I found this list very inspiring, although at times completely ridiculous. There are definitely elements of irreverence, which is probably why I find it so fascinating.

After analyzing these ways to feel better, I came to the conclusion that if you want to take the first step to feeling awesome, you better become the master of distraction. Some of these methods really stood out and made me think “Yup, that is probably something I could do”. I feel it is my duty to highlight some of these fantastically ridiculous catalysts for feeling better. Here are my top five:

1. “Write an awful one-act play. Then read it aloud. Make sure to distinguish between characters by changing the timbre of your voice. If still sad: drink.”
Why it is brilliant: I am a huge fan of making a fool of myself. What makes it even better is that there is no one around to laugh at you while you are doing it! And let’s face it, if you have ever heard any of the “off-the-wall” things I say frequently, you know any awful one-act play that I write will be one for the history books. If that fails, whiskey is the next best option.

2. “Make a list of things you fear. This should be both “trivial” things (e.g. mice, things that go *bump* in the night) and “big” things (e.g. death, failure, et cetera). Think long and hard about these things, and decide which would be most feasible to overcome. Then, overcome it.”
Why this is brilliant: I am good at being trivial. I am also good at being terrified of the “biggies” (failure, death, the sky falling…). Why not put it all out there on the table and think about them. And then move on. Maybe I will actually quit being a wimp whenever I see a spider?

3. “Rearrange your furniture. Position pieces with the end goal of creating more open space. If still sad, built a goddamn skylight.”
Why this is brilliant: I love to move things around. Depending on what you are moving, you can get a pretty nice workout. Also, sometimes you end up making a terrible mess. I do not know about you, but there are times I just want to make the biggest mess in the world (and then promptly clean it up). Destruction (constructively speaking) can be very therapeutic. Hence the true reason why I love this method so much: build a skylight. Just do not tell my roommate… or landlord.

4. “Go to the bank, but do not make a deposit. Walk up to the candy jar, take a sucker and leave. Don’t take no for an answer.”
Why this is brilliant: I am not usually a huge risk taker and the possibilities of someone thinking you are trying to rob the bank are higher than any other trip you might take to that place of business. With that being said, sometimes you need a little danger in your life. In the land of “Skylar”, this is dangerous enough. I also imagine it would be rather empowering to walk in, know why you are there, and make it happen. This is on my to-do list for May.

5. “Start a conversation with a stranger. Ask them how they lost their virginity, or where they grew up, or who they’re named after. If they return your question, lie — re-invent yourself for a moment.”
Why this is brilliant: This is a combination of two things I rather enjoy- being socially awkward and being ridiculous. I can think of a million mortifying questions to ask and I have the imagination to make up just as weird of answers. Who knows, maybe I will make some new friends (depending on just how creepy the conversation gets).

Either you found this post helpful, ridiculous, or grounds for committing me. Regardless, go check out the article for more crazy ways to make yourself feel better. Maybe once this cold medicine wears off, my posts will make more sense…. (do not get your hopes up).


-Skylar, Master of Distraction (In Training)

2 Responses to “Feeling Better (A.K.A. Becoming the Master of Distraction)”

  1. Hi Skylar–thanks for reading! Bank suckers work wonders for colds.


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